Those of you who know me know that I generally speak off the cuff, often times cussing to make a point, and more than not offend people without having a second thought. I don’t tend to hold back my opinion, so long as it is the truth. But those of you who know me before my mid-20’s know that I was never like this. I never spoke my mind, rarely did I want to share my opinion, because honestly, I didn’t think it mattered. But upon reflection, I can recall several instances where various individuals in my life poked and prodded at me with their opinions—”You should learn the read the language you speak”, in regards to learning how to read music. “I bet you can’t count to 10 ‘cause you’re just a stupid home-schooler!” the kids shouted at me when I was 9. "
For almost everything I’ve done that has bettered me as a person, there was someone behind it with a word of advice or another kind of remark that instigated a move in me. I wanted a challenge and whenever someone rose to that occasion, whether it was with kind words or in a wicked fashion, I met them with personal growth.
So what about this? Should we not have filters when we talk to one anther? Am I advocating bullying or justifying abuse? No of course not, that is absurd. Abuse and social cruelty have made my life harder than it needed to be and made me fall behind my peers. The grace of God is the only thing that has pulled me up from that rubbish that made my life as black as night. But when we can separate ourselves from the words projected at us, when we can receive from others, even in a cross tongue, their words as beneficial to us in some way, we can use those words as a ladder rather than a dead end.
I call these people “nudgers”. They can either nudge you down a bad path or nudge you towards a path of righteousness. When we have wisdom and prudence, how much more effective is nudging? When we know better, and we’ve seen the light of peace and joy in our lives, how much more honorable is nudging so that others may also come to experience abundant living?
But nudging must be purposeful and it must be done in charity if we are to be truly helpful in the lives of others. And you can nudge too much so you have to know when to back away.